m-ignon:

dreamboatsandtrenchcoats:

Instead of saying motherfucker you can just say Oedipus

Half of our generation wouldn’t even understand that

winking-skeever:

Is anyone else weirdly self-conscious about wiper blade speed? Like, I’m always afraid that I’ll have them set too fast for the amount of rain happening, and people will look at me and judge me like “lol omg bitch be tryin 2 hard”

fyoured:

BE VAIN AND BE UNASHAMED. LOVE YOURSELF FIERCELY AND TELL ANYONE WHO DOESN’T LIKE IT TO GO FUCK THEMSELVES.

bookthiefing:

RED THE BLOOD OF ANGRY MEN

TEA A DRINK WITH JAM AND BREAD

sweet-bitsy:

breanieswordvomit:

caffeinated-zombie:

So, in the middle of everything today, we ran across a hellaciously distressed momma mallard and a bunch of her baby ducks that had fallen down a sewer grate. Another guy was already trying to fish them out, so my friend and I called animal control before we tried to fish the rest of them out. When Animal Control got there, we had all of them out and the mother duck quacking very happily. I was surprised - none of us got snapped at or hurt. I was even holding onto a bag at one point that had all of them in it and she just watched me. 

I love how the duck is perched on the guy’s butt

I’M SO HAPPY

mosoli:

im still laughing at this

mosoli:

im still laughing at this